Week 8 :-: Communicate with a purpose.

Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O LORD, my strength, and my redeemer. Psalms 19:14

Objectives

• Define effective communication
• Explore hindrances to effective communication

A lot has been said and written about the art of effective communication. You may have even already taken a course on effective communication. What exactly is communication and why is this an important skill for the Servant leader? Generally, leaders communicate in order to effect action, motivate, encourage, challenge, inform and correct. Jesus communicated in such a way that his message did not leave anyone indifferent. Servant leaders as good stewards are equally required to model their communication in a way that is uplifting and life giving.  How is your communication?

Per Anthony D’Souza, “effective communication is the core of all leadership activity”. The Bible, for example, is a book that communicates God’s mind to the world. It communicates His vision, methods and ultimate promise to all those that accept His gift of forgiveness and salvation through Jesus Christ.

Take this short test to help determine our communication skills. Click here, https://www.activia.co.uk/communication-skills-test answer the questions and hit submit. What did you discover about your communication style?

Knowing how to communicate ideas, vision, data, feelings etc. effectively is of absolute importance since all leadership starts and ends with communication. All communication includes a sender, their message, the receiver and medium via which the message is being communicated. Never assume that just because you spoke, your receiver(s) clearly understood your message. Seeking feedback is therefore key, as this will help you determine if your communication was effective. Humans communicate in the following ways:

1. Spoken or Verbal – this could either be face-to-face or telephone;
2. Written – Includes letters, sms, emails, books, blogs and/or other internet based written communication;
3.  Non-Verbal communication – This includes body-language (such as face expressions, posture, crossing the hands etc.), dressing and other actions;
4. Listening - Practice active listening. Proverbs 18:13 - He that answereth a matter before he heareth [it], it [is] folly and shame unto him;
5. Sign Language – Even though this may be classified as an example of non-verbal communication, it really does not fall under that category, as sign language is separate means of communicating with people who have an auditory impairment.  

Dr. Mehrabian estimated that spoken communication consists of 55% body language, 38 % voice, tone, and only 7% words! This implies that communication is not just about words. Emotions which determine tone and voice as well as body language make up a higher percentage of communication. Picture Jesus in your mind, after His disciples woke him up from sleep because the winds and the waves hit hard on the boat and they were scared for their lives. How do you think He sounded and what kind of body language (including facial expressions) did he manifest when He asked them, “…Why are you, so afraid…?”  Matthew 8:26. Think about this for a minute.

In order for the communication to be effective, the sender must define the Who (who is my target audience? Is my message relevant to them), What (what is my message and what should I include or leave out? Proverbs 25:11 - A word fitly spoken [is like] apples of gold in pictures of silver.), Why (why do I want to communicate this message and why is it important?), When (when is the right time  to communicate) and How ( How should I communicate to ensure greater understanding) of his/her message. In addition to this, the sender must determine a means of evaluating how they intend to receive feedback, which confirms the success of their message. Communication is termed successful therefore only when meaning is transferred and a corresponding action is taken regarding the exchange of information.

While everything may be in place to ensure an effective communication, the sender has to seek to understand possible hindrances. Hindrances may contribute in distorting the message and include (but not limited to):

• The receiver’s bias. Sometimes people choose to hear/read what they would like to hear/read rather than what is actually spoken/written);
• Medium of the communication. This could include how the message is delivered in addition to vocabulary. Try to decode this phrase: “Loquacious personages are frequently intoxicated by their own verbosity!” Even though I may have sounded super impressive, did you get what I meant? Was it helpful? Keep it short and simple whenever possible.
• Distractions. It is not a great idea to have a planning meeting in an area where there is a lot of movement. Other sources of distraction can include mobile phones as well as Power Point presentations that contain too much text, video or images.
• Poor Listening skills. Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath James 1:19. Great communications starts with learning how to listen correctly. Are you a good listener? There is definitely a reason why God gave each one of us, two ears and just a single mouth. As servant leaders, we need to develop our active listening skills; this is vital to becoming an effective communicator. It is possible to hear without listening as listening is an active process that requires a conscious effort and concentration. Repeat back what you have heard to the speaker/sender to ensure you received the message clearly. Use phrases such as, “please confirm this is what you mean…” . In addition to using open-ended clarifying questions, stay focused, withhold your personal judgements, do not interrupt, be careful not to stereotype and if possible write down what you are hearing.
• Irrelevant facts. Tailor your message to fit your audience. They do not need to know everything on the subject, just the part that is relevant to their experience. Ephesians 4:29 - Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers.

While you seek to deal with hindrances, do not forget to always seek to frame your message positively. This will have greater receptibility than if you frame it negatively. Write and speak for impact and clarity as well as seek to both provide as well as receive feedback. The greatest communicator is one who first seeks to understand in all humility where the people are, before trying to get their ideas through to them.

Week 8 Assignment:

1. Rate your communication skills using the following questions:

• Am I a good listener (1-5)?
• Do I speak clearly and confidently (1-5)?
• Do I seek to impact people with my writing (1-5)?

2. Ask at least 5 different people in your inner circle (including at least one person you interviewed in week 1) to evaluate your communication skills using the following questions:

Am I a good listener (1-5)?

Do I speak clearly and confidently (1-5)?

What can I do to improve on my communication?

3. Set a SMART goal for improving your communication.
4. If you had one idea that you would like to communicate to all your friends for the next 12 months, what would that be?  After writing the idea, write a brief introduction (picture all your friends in one room and listening to you, as you write your introduction). Post your introduction and share the link in your group.
5. Write a brief summary of what you learned this week and explain why it is important for all leaders. Post on your blog and share this second link in your group also.